


Aftermath

by littlekittykanny



Series: Shambles of the 587th [2]
Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-05
Updated: 2017-07-05
Packaged: 2018-11-28 06:51:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11412537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlekittykanny/pseuds/littlekittykanny
Summary: Kot, Phobos, and Faultline try to deal with the aftermath of their surviving commander's suicide attempt.





	Aftermath

Pain flashed through her body as she felt herself come back to consciousness. Blinking slowly, she stared up at the blinding white around her. She wasn’t dead. She wasn’t dead and these weren’t her quarters. Her electric blue eyes widened as she realized where she was.

She was in the medbay. She’d failed to kill herself. She’d failed again.

Dalia struggled to try and remember what happened after she cut her arms up. She could remember bringing the blade to her throat-

“Commander, you can’t make me give up on you. Nobody can. So, stop trying.”

Kot.

Kot had found her. He’d taken the knife from her hands. His face had been contorted with fear and pain. The normal “I-love-you-dearly-but-you’re-all-terrible” smile had been replaced with a frown so deep it made the young trooper look years beyond his age.

She remembered how his hands were shaking after he threw the knife. She remembered the projection of hurt, pain, and most of all guilt. She could feel him blaming himself for not keeping a better watch over her. She could feel his struggle to keep himself together as she was falling apart. The guilt came back to gnaw at her, an uncomfortable feeling settling in the pit of her stomach.

Dalia tried to move her arm, but found she couldn’t. Panic began to bubble in her chest. Had they restrained her? Oh Force! Why wouldn’t they? She tried to slash her own throat-of course they would tie her down!

The more alarmed she became, the less groggy and clouded her head became. It was as if the rush of adrenaline was kicking the last of the tranquilizers out of her system. The more aware she became, the more puzzled she was. She could feel other presences in the room with her, but no medic had come over to her yet.

Dalia finally looked down only to let out a soft gasp. Yes, her arms were restrained, but not by straps. She could see two mops of black hair on either side of her. Her hands were being held tightly by strong, calloused fingers, her arms curled into theirs.

Kot and Faultline were both leaning over from their chairs onto her bed, fast asleep. Each trooper had claimed an arm to hold, making sure to be gentle of the wires attached to her and to not apply to much pressure on her wounds.

“You really had us scared.”

Dalia let out a soft cry as her attention turned to the speaker. Sure enough, in his still dark mauve and white armor, Phobos stood at the foot of the bed.

The older clone looked exhausted. He had bags under his eyes and his hair was in disarray. His goatee had grown longer, and it looked as if the man hadn’t been taking care of himself. He still had that a smile for her.

It was a sad smile, but a smile all the same. It was a smile that screamed ‘why did you do this’ but also cried ‘I’m so happy you’re awake’. He was trying to be strong for her, when in her mind, she should have been the one being strong.

She gave him a sad smile as well before rasping, “I’m sorry.”

Phobos nodded solemnly before sighing, “I know. I read the note. Faultline didn’t and Kot didn’t read it in full. Kot was too worried trying to stop you to finish and Faultline came here immediately as soon as he heard you were hurt.”

He walked towards the head of her bed, carefully stepping around Kot. He stood still for a moment before running his fingers through his commander’s auburn hair.

“It’s okay to feel sad about losing General Ahearn. She was an amazing woman. She even let me touch her tendrils once because I was curious. She was supportive and encouraging, and probably the closest thing you had to a mom,” he began, still combing a hand through her hair. “You were well loved by the entire battalion, I can tell you that now. They may have been a little irritated because you’re young, but they loved your antics as much as the general did. It’s okay to feel sad-”

“I-I-It’s not just that. I…”

“You what?”

“I don’t know if you’d understand.”

“Try me.”

Dalia swallowed before shutting her eyes for a brief moment. She took a deep breath and said, “Masters and padawans have a bond. When a master trains a padawan, a bond is created in the Force between them. Master Ahearn could feel when I was upset or scared. She knew if I was hurt or lost just by using that bond. When she died, I felt it break. I felt her die, Phobos.”

Phobos was quiet for a moment before noticing Dalia was once again trying to fight back tears. He removed his hand from her hair before softly asking, “You’ve gotta be thirsty. Lemme get you some water and we’ll keep talking.”  
He moved once more to grab a cup when he heard a shaken cry of relief. Phobos turned to see that Faultline had woken up.

“Commander-what-happened-I-just-hear-you-were-hurt-and-I-got-here-fast-and-Kot-said-you-did-this-to-yourself-is-that-true-Commander-I-am-so-glad-you-are-awake-”

“Faultline, slow down. Yes, she did do this to herself. We were just talking about why. See if you can’t wake Kot up. We need to have a serious talk,” Phobos said flatly.

He retrieved some water and looked at Faultline.

“Free her arm from your clutches so she can drink some water.”

Faultline immediately let her arm go and grabbed the cup from Phobos. He made sure she was able to grip the cup before letting go. The trooper then reached across the bed and pulled his brother’s hair.

Kot’s head shot up before he snapped, “‘Line, what the feck-!”

“Let Dalia take a sip of her water before you go off on him,” Phobos interrupted. “Dali, explain exactly what you mean by you felt the general die.”

The girl sipped the water slowly before turning her gaze from one brother to the next. Phobos looked calm, clearly waiting for a logical explanation. Faultline looked more relieved than anything else. It was Kot she was worried about.

His expression was blank and icy, as if Dalia had committed some act of treason.

“Remember when that time when we were exploring ruins and a piece of the ceiling fell and I almost lost my arm?” Dalia asked the three.

That got Kot to wince. He remembered that very well. A sharp edge of the roof had punctured her shoulder, and they were lucky it hadn’t completely severed her arm. The general had said that a puncture wound was something she could fix, a missing limb, not so much.

Dalia had actually been screaming in pain, which was rather unusual for someone who could brush off blaster wounds with moderate success.

“I could feel my master’s fear. Not for herself, but for me, for her men. I could feel the pain as she was shot, as if I’d been shot myself…I could feel her fading from the Force.”

Dalia paused to inhale shakily, Phobos back at the head of her bed. The elder of the three troopers was playing with her hair and telling her to take her time.

“When she died….it felt like I’d been pierced by that chunk of roof again. Except this time, it felt like the roof had punctured my chest. My lungs felt like they were burning. I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I-I-I keep having nightmares about her dying, about the pain of the bond severing!”

Faultline felt his heart clench. He had no idea that’s how the whole master-padawan thing worked, but if it really worked like that than he could understand why she’d do something like this.

“It feels like someone has taken a limb, yet the pain of the bond feels like someone has broken my rib cage and tore my heart out. I just wanted the nightmares to end,” she whispered. “I just wanted to be able to sleep without being haunted by dead bodies.”

Kot felt sick once more. He couldn’t take it anymore. He couldn’t take having her lay there in pain while he sat off to the side. He knew it was unprofessional, but at that point he no longer cared.

He stood up abruptly and asked, “Can you sit up Commander?”

Dalia looked confused but nodded.

“I think so…”

Phobos gently helped her sit up a little before Kot slid into the spot behind her. He settled her between his legs and had her lean back against him. Kot gently pulled her back down, resting her head against his chest. He wrapped his arms around her gently, as if he was afraid she’d break on contact.

At first neither brother could figure out what Kot was doing. It wasn’t until Faultline saw Dalia slowly go limp that it hit him.

Dalia could hear his heartbeat.

Kot hadn’t been wearing armor, so there was nothing but cloth to keep the Jedi from hearing his pulse.

Dalia could hear his heart beating, his lungs expanding. She could feel the living Force within him, and it seemed to soothe her.

“We didn’t attach restraints to your wrists because we worried you would panic. General Koon even thought it was a bad idea. He figured you may feel trapped,” Kot explained, his voice soft. “Please, don’t do that again. Please, Commander…Dalia. Dalia, talk to us next time. Tell us, so we can help. Don’t shut us out.”

Gentle shaking told Kot that Dalia had been pushed to tears. He simply tightened his hold, cuddling his commander close. Kot had always enjoyed that the commander was smaller than most. He or any of his brothers could easily move her in case of an emergency or just to make her giggle. He enjoyed the close contact it allowed him. He was comforted by her presence, by her voice, by her smile. Kot didn’t want to lose her.

Dalia’s thoughts were along the same train of thought.

She was grateful for Kot’s hold, his firm grasp keeping her centered. She curled her legs in tight to her chest. She could hear him breathing. She could feel his heartbeat. Dalia could feel the presence of the Force in the man holding her steady, reminding her that she wasn’t on that moon anymore.

Dalia was with Master Plo and his men. She was with her three troopers. They were all alive. They were alive and relatively okay.

She felt the bed shift and heard Kot snort.

Faultline had crawled onto the bed and chose to rest with his head leaning against her side. The other trooper wanted to help as well, but he didn’t know how. So he offered the only thing he felt he could give, physical comfort.

Phobos sat on the edge of the bed, leaning more on Kot than her. He continued to play with her hair until Dalia’s eyes began to droop.

She sighed deeply, pulling on the three Force signatures to remind herself they were there. Her boys were there with her. Her boys had her back. Her boys cared for her. Her boys wanted her to stay with them.

Dalia knew they hadn’t understood what losing Master Ahearn felt like entirely, but she appreciated the effort. Sleep once again tugged at her, but this time, Dalia let herself drift off to sleep. She knew that if she had any nightmares, she’d have her boys by her side to help chase them away.

When Master Plo returned to check on Dalia, he was faced with a dilemma. While it was quite precious to see the three clones snuggled up with Dalia, it was unprofessional and against protocol. Then again, seeing the peaceful look on the padawan’s face was worth a little rule breaking. He knew that she wasn’t feeling safe and that her boys were the only familiar things she had left.

He remembered how painful it was to lose most of his men to the separatist weapon, but he had been a full fledged Jedi when his master died. Their bond had been weakened at that point. The only person he could think of to ask would be Obi-wan. The man had lost his master while still a padawan as well and his master was also murdered.

That gave Plo an idea. Obi-wan had mentioned he wanted a new padawan. Who better to help her overcome her pain, than a man who had suffered a similar loss? Obi-wan could better understand the pain and terror of having the bond so violently broken than he or most other masters could.

He took one last look at the bed before snapping a holopic. Kot was peacefully resting with Dalia laying against his chest curled practically into a ball. Faultline was next to Dalia’s feet, sprawled out as much as possible while Phobos was laying on his side, leaning against Kot, one hand in Dalia’s hair.

Plo chuckled quietly to himself before turning to exit the room. He had much to discuss with the council, especially Obi-wan.


End file.
